It's less than a week until Thanksgiving. Have you tracked down a turkey?
According to people who act like they know what they're talking about, turkeys will be scarce on this year's Thanksgiving table thanks to Joe Biden. Unfortunately, it's too late to order a honey baked ham, also thanks to Joe Biden.
If you were counting on some good stuffing and mashed potatoes for your meal but haven't picked them up yet, you're probably out of luck. Of course, the reason for that is unloaded cargo ships and supply chain breakdowns and Joe Biden.
Many of you might have been looking forward to that traditional pumpkin pie but I'm betting you forgot to plant pumpkins in your garden last spring. Whose fault is that?
Right. Joe Biden.
The price of gas has about doubled in the last year. Keep in mind hurricanes took out a good percentage of our refinery capacity this summer, and demand a year ago was minimal because of the pandemic. Today people want to get out and go so demand is sky high.
And who's responsible for the hurricanes and the pandemic and the sky high demand? Here's looking at you Biden.
According to the last turkey I saw gobbling through eastern Kentucky, everything wrong with anything in today's America is Biden Biden Biden. It should be noted the turkey, aka Senator Poodle-Do, is not responsible for any of our problems because he has never actually done anything but gobble his entire adult life.
Doing things is so twentieth century. His superior intellect allows him to think about doing great things instead of actually doing anything which is much more efficient and doesn't scuff up his Topsiders. When he runs short of ideas he consults Aqua Buddha and changes khakis.
With Thanksgiving on the way, I for one am thankful that thoughtful thinkers like Poodle Do Paul will visit to remind us that the infrastructure bill which guarantees quick completion of roads through our area, cleaner water lines, faster internet connections, and jobs, jobs and more jobs is a terrible thing great thinkers like himself would never think of.
For example, there's not a billionaire's tax cut in it. Clearly infrastructure isn't for deep thinkers.
Maybe the great thinker Paul the Younger will one day become a real doctor and apply his intellect to the epidemic of drug overdoses ripping Kentucky families apart. In a year that saw over 100,000 drug overdoses for the first time in American history, Kentucky's death rate grew 55%. There are few in the state who haven't been touched by the opioid crisis.
As we near Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for the people and the programs that fight the problems we have in our community and in our country. I'm thankful for the people who engage and enlighten. I'm thankful for those who preach peace.
I'm also thankful we can still question, can still poke fun, and can still throw a print fit over something that needs fitting. There's a whole lot wrong in our world but that doesn't mean a whole lot isn't right. Thanks Joe Biden.