A broken clock is right twice a day. That's still a way better average than the current administration.
But when it's right, even by accident, your trusted pseudo-journalists at SJ Unlimited will give credit where credit is due. As soon as we get paid.
So when we found out the Trump Administration's Justice Department was going after big tech companies like Facebook, Google and Amazon for monopolistic practices we paid attention. In 2019 that means putting down the phone, turning off the cable news, and putting TMZ on snooze.
As it turns out, while those three huge corporations and many more are certainly monopolies, the invistigation isn't about competition so much as it's about combustion.
The guy who owns Amazon also owns a newspaper in Washington, DC, and Cadet Bonespurs wants to blow him up good. Because Jeff Bezos hasn't bowed to the altar of Trump, the high Trumpets are going to see if they can't hobble him to get that neck bent.
Unfortunately for Facebook and Google, Herr Donald doesn't quite get that Bezos doesn't own them, too. There's no way that young kid from Harvard owns all that Facestuff and those guys in charge of Google aren't even American, if you go by the official American skintone scale.
Justice Department officials are quick to point out that Amazon was named after that place those strong women come from, which is all the reason this administration needs to grab it, fondle it and put it on its knees. Strong women are the second greatest threat to Trump, we mean America, after those dirty brown kids sitting in cages along our southern border.
Just an aside, we know many of you believe it is facts that are the greatest threat to the Trumpster, to which we say "Say What?". Get your head out of the small print people! Facts in the reality TV era are as dangerous as a box of fuzzy kittens.
Those same Justice Department officials, off the record, stated the focus of the investigation is really all about Amazon and Bezos. Facebook, Google and others were named just to make it look like they were serious about monopolies.
Amazingly, the Justice Department officials admit this is really all about spite and nothing else. Kill monopolies? That would lead to actual competition and competition is the last thing the Donald wants to be a part of. Besides, without Facebook, how would Russians manipulate the sheep...we mean electorate.
When I noted that working out of spite doesn't sound much like justice to me, they quickly pointed out the error of my thinking.
The Trump Justice Department isn't exactly about laws and enforcement, it's about Jim Justice, the tax avoiding, company bankrupting, employee stiffing governor of West Virginia and the state's only billionaire.
They were quick to remind me in Trump's America, justice is for billionaires only. Except the ones that don't bow to the Cheetoh. Then justice is about spite.
So the next thing you read about the Justice Department, take the time to check your clock. It's probably broken, too.