Something's falling from the Trump family tree. It doesn't look an apple, though.
Donald, Jr., aka T-Cube (The Tanned Trump), might still be wondering why a couple people are mad he jumped at the chance to meet with a Russian attorney with dirt on Hillary Clinton last year. I mean, who wouldn't love to, right?
In reality TV land, you can't go too low to get the win. Anything is fair, including conspiring with a hostile foreign power to swing a democratic election. In lala-land, it's something to be proud of not treason.
Starting soon we're going to find out if we're still the United States of America under a constitution or if we've become Reality TV of America under a producer.
The timing of these revelations was certainly interesting. I'm sure it's only a coincidence that Julian Assange advised T-Cube to release that e-mail chain a couple days after the Putin-Donald rendezvous.
But Julian wanted him to release them anonymously on WikiLeaks and T-Cube wanted to own it. Because that's how a Trump rolls.
It turns out Cube, his brother in law, and the campaign manager sat down with a Kremlin operative to get bad Hillary stories and 3 days later candidate Trump announces "coming big news" that will be "very bad for Hillary". Soon after Wikileaks is carpet bombing the presidential campaign with stolen e-mail.
Somehow Assange knew "his enemies" had T-Cubes emails and was going to use them. He knew the e-mail exchange referred to the Kremlin's support of a Trump candidacy. He knew the e-mail was green lighting a meeting to learn secret harmful information provided by the Kremlin from a government attorney.
You'd think if he knew so much about them, he'd have them. And if he had them, wouldn't he have put them on his website himself?
But anyway, I digress.
We may never know that one. Why? Because 58% of Republicans believe higher education is bad for America. If that's the trend, we probably won't be learning anything much new anymore, anyway.
The good news is we won't know we don't know because an even bigger percentage think a free press ain't such a good idea, either.
In a world where money is speech, if you got no money you're silent. And that's exactly how the owners of that party want it.
Fellow cretins, buck up, we're not the only victims. The stuff falling out of the Trump tree isn't just hitting us. Turns out T-Cubes emails weren't the only things hackers were stealing from Trump computers.
Between August 2016 and March 2017, hackers got names, addresses and credit card information from guests at 14 Trump branded properties. It wasn't the first time.
Trump International just paid $50,000 in fines to New York state for losing 70,000 credit card numbers in a similar breach in 2015.
There might be some of you, like me, who get perverse pleasure out of this bit of news. You might say it serves them right for buying into Trump's fantasy world.
Just let me remind you these guys are talking about upgrading government cyber networks to the same standards of their businesses.
It'll be the best Moscow has to offer.