The neighbors came over the other morning with a pot of coffee. I had plenty to tell them but I couldn't get a word in edgewise.
"Been in hiding SJ? haven't seen much of you in a month."
I cleared my throat. "Well I've been..."
"Where's your cup SJ?" I ran into the kitchen, grabbed one and returned. "I've been..."
Tater had taken the pot from Meat and began pouring into my cup. "Hold that thing still. I'm sure you'll be glad to know I've forgiven you."
I was glad to know. Tater had ignored me on the porch twice since I told her her fellow progressives elected the last two Republican presidents. The only thing I had going for me was it was true and she knew it.
"I am glad to hear that Tater. I thought..."
"Here's one that'll make you think SJ." Meat was a little too excited. "It turns out elephants have names. I'm not kidding. African elephants call each other unique names. What do you think my elephant name would be?"
Before I could "ummm" Tater was all over him. "If that isn't obvious as the fat on your belly, Dumbo! Dumbo Dumbo Dumbo!"
She swung her hips in opposite directions with each Dumbo. Meat didn't make a peep because he knew better. Tater gave one last hip swing dumbo and looked at me.
"Can you believe him SJ?" She deepened her voice and lowered her eyes. "No way Hunter gets convicted in Delaware. No way." Then she broke into a laughing fit.
"The old rigged trial argument goes out the window when the president's son gets convicted in Dover, don't it Meat."
Meat recoiled. "Now don't put that on me Tater, you know I haven't been repeating the lies. Tell him."
Tater softened. "No, SJ, Meat hasn't been telling any of the lies. But he didn't think Hunter would get guilty 3 times, either."
"Nope I didn't. It gives me hope."
I was about to say I was glad he has hope when Tater kept rambling. "I'm glad you've got hope, honey. Sometimes I wonder. When you've got supreme court justices flying stop the steal flags and declaring the country needs to get back to its Christian ways it's hard. I just wonder if he's talking the witch hunting christian ways or the slave holding christian ways.
Meat responded. "Anything but the love thy neighbor christian ways, you can bet on that baby."
It was at that point we all saw the ticker at the bottom of my TV read "Jerry West dead at 86." Tater responded first.
"I think I've heard of him. Who's Jerry West?"
"The logo." Meat responded. "Greatest athlete to ever come out of West Virginia. All American, Olympic gold, won one NBA championship as a player, 10 as a general manager and consultant. He put together the Magic Johnson/Kareen Jabbar Lakers, the Kobe Bryant/Shaquille O'Neal Lakers, and the Stef Curry Golden State Warriors."
Tater made a face. "Well I'm a Celtics girl. You can have the Lakers."
Meat stood. "This news calls for another pot of coffee. Come on Tater, let's get outa here. SJ won't tell us anything, might as well go home."